back at it...

the creative board has been summoned."ladies and gentlemen, ready,steady,CHURN(out ideas)!". even if my thinking cap (proper) is not on, at least the creative one is sitting pretty on the head (albeit slightly off centre). it's that time of the year where the creative juices flow and most of the output tend towards the warped. :O) hey, i'm a believer in diversity. it makes for an (even more) interesting world. i seriously think that we, humans, thrive on the complicated. as much as we're conditioned to accept the fact that we're all the same (essentially), it really is beautiful to embrace our differences as well. i remember researching for an essay on multiculturalism, and coming across many articles opposing the idea of actually highlighting cultural differences in communities. this is based on the notion that it is a form of racism. by pointing out the differences (be it through celebration or otherwise) we would be able to identify and use (according to one's evil discretion, assumably) to pick on the 'weaker' race. at the time of writing the essay, i thought it was really an interesting take on the idea of multiculturalism..a concept condoned more so by Asian countries (or rather, leaders of Asian countries). but having just had 3 weeks worth of world-watching and having lots of time on my hands to contemplate about everything (from the menial to the more complex issues that make up one's existence/co-existence with the rest of the planet), i'm even more convinced that noticing the contrasts differences make (be it small or big) should be encouraged. of course there will always be issues. but that's just the human spirit. call it self-sabotage. we need to have that struggle in order to find satisfaction...

and no. this isnt me trying to sound philosophical, at all. just some of the mumbo-jumbo swirling around in the head and causing interruption of coherent thought. heh..syncopated rhythm and blues...that's me at the mo. mind playing around with ideas and wreaking havoc...making a something out of nothing. as usual it's right on cue,just when i need to get down to work proper. ahhhh....self sabotage!!!!!!!!!!

(/p>
feeling "too young to hold on, too old to just break free and run.."(jeff buckley).

shuffling blonde...

OHMYGOOOODNESSS..jeff buckley totally hits the note with my soul at the moment. winter has descended upon us, and i'm keeping warm and cosy with my fave tunes from my darker-hued collections. funny that, how i seem to thrive on the sad tunes to keep me (ridiculously) happy during the shorter colder days. well, i'm not quite stuck in the throes of winter music emo yet, so i've got my slow tracks (more tempo effect, rather than lyrics) in the set just for good measure. heh. shuffle mode rocks. i've got bread, interpol, the beatles, damien rice, jeff buckley, diana krall, and aqualung. if i could be bothered, i would put the shins ('those to come') in the line up as well. but really, jeff buckley's 'last goodbye'...OHhhh. who can live without it...thank you for the music.

whoa. major update session needed. even the pics are looking a bit blah. morning walks are in order! the lack of attention to my blogalog says it all, well most of it. the last 2 (!!) months were filled with time-consuming activities- casual work (unlimited hours, cos that's how i came packaged), sleep (or lackthereof..ahem), illness(es of varying degrees). oh and the usual do-nothing-worrry of job applications (or, again, lackthereof). ah. trivial matters, surely. yes, admittedly. but prioritisation is something i need to work on (so i've been wisely advised). and so i shall, with my priority pen and priority paper. oh, and my relaxed/revamped/toughened (pudgy) body and (prioritised)mind. ok, so maybe not the mind as yet, but it'll come to soon (ish) and we'll be sorted. sor'ed.
cruising down the freeway...LIFE IN THE FAST LANE. 'cept i'm choosing to drive slow :O)
oh and south island is gorgeous. i wanna live in a place like that when i wind down and kick up the heels. (mena, we could come to a compromise? scotland in summer..)

one more for the road...

stapes again...hey, at least we know my role in our 'old-age' relationship. heh. ok, "i will do the dishes, if you'll pay all the bills..",cowgirl. but if my brain leans towards the female... doesnt that actually make me more male? hmmmm...and besides, thinking with the heart is such a male thing. :O)

Your Brain is 73.33% Female, 26.67% Male

Your brain leans female You think with your heart, not your head Sweet and considerate, you are a giver But you're tough enough not to let anyone take advantage of you!

What Gender Is Your Brain?

nonsensism...

the prism of colours with which we choose to colour our memories and glaze over the negative is certainly a contributory factor in accomodating feelings of nostalgia and longing - especially when one wishes to escape the present and its obstacles. we dream in black and white? so, when we rest and relax, all thoughts (because we're never really able to rid ourselves of ourselves)and visuals conceived are really just 'rough' pieces. having to juggle colours in one's sleep, doesn't sound too appealing...especially if one has problems doing so even when fully conscious (by societal standards, of course). so, shouldn't our colourful efforts of being able to paint a picture, so enticing that it invites notions of escapism, be applauded? executing the right to artistic license and all. gives one something to think about...it's all in the mind. :O)

W.I.P...almost..

strange lil girl..(as the stranglers would put it)

"..i'm not aware of too many things, i know what i know, if you know what i mean..."edie brickell and the new bohemians. totally makes sense. to me. like most of my output, anyways, where no thought is given to the consequences that will inevitably ensue..until mid-sentence. and by then, it's usually too late. hah. master of manipulation i am not. (dammit..that leaves out politics from the prospective careers list then..spin doctor and all). it is a form of sensationalism though. depending on how you look at it(a lil more to the left). never mind that it could be the most boring of subject matters, the statement/question once dampened out whilst in the mind's of others will now have a new lease of life..living life out loud, even. :O)
BUT, in my defense, maybe it's a type of trait/characteristic (stupidity?)that is, really, an inherent part of one's cultural background...ok, so leave out the alcohol in the equation, and maybe it's just a chindian thing. hey, we're a special bunch. we pack a punch. i'm tired (finally), my eyes hurt. my toes burn. anyone got an extra sleep card lying around? i'd like to trade one of my hyppy-haper ones at the mo. wise-app phase.

music to my ears..

words to my hands, warmth to my heart.

the strangest feelings..

i woke up with a start today. actually, i jolted in and out of the somewhat strange state of slumber (if at all it was that) several times throughout the course of the morning. yes, i crawled into bed at 3am but then managed to keep a two-hourly vigil on my clock all the way to 7.30am. and that's when i decided that i'd had enough...did a bit of a walkabout in the apartment...and then made a conscious decision to not go for my morning walk. why? well, besides having majorly puffy eyes and an achy body, i wasn't feeling in the right frame of mind. actually feeling out of sorts. perturbed, ever so slightly. as with all dreams, i remember only fragments of it. the bits just before i woke up each time. and that last time, i was overcome by an overwhelming sense of sadness. whilst i can't really pinpoint which part of the vague dream fragment caused the descend into that unstable emotional state, it was one of those that hit a nerve of some sort. maybe i've just had too much of nothing on my mind, perhaps causing the soul to search with a greater need...therefore becoming more attuned/aware/sensitive to the surroundings..to others. i'm creeping myself out. maybe i need to be sucked into a vacuum for a while.

schmoozing for stapey...

nye'04-fed sq

of arachnophobics and g'days...

come come. let me share some of my amazing stories in wonderland this year, thus far. for starters, the new year was ushered into melbourne in true city style..with all the fanfare of a two-session fireworks display (9.30 for kids and midnite for the rest), a two and a half hour Cat Empire gig (part of their ATTACK tour),DJs, a dance stage, pub overspills, police, police, drunks,police,annoying teenagers, even more annoying families with terrors-on-wheels..you get the general idea. but i have to say, that i had a pretty goode night myself. it was a relatively quiet evening complete with libation (copious,p'haps, but responsible as always!), highly entertaining company, a crazy reason to hop into a cab 15 minutes before midnight, a wicked crazy cabby who gave us a wicked crazy ride back to the city with 5 mins to spare, and a numb arm by the end of the night. hah. good times. and i had that numb arm as a constant reminder for a whole two weeks after.
everything else has been pretty much as you'd expect it to be during summer, out here in good ol' melb. even the weather...not that it's been all that hot, this year. just a smattering of scorchers, for good measure, to reinstate the fact it is supposed to be summer. good news for the winter flabs, though. still ample opportunity to cover-up whilst shaping up and shipping out the old flabs to make way for the onset of new ones next month. oh, and bikinis are a fashion faux pas, this summer. wraps, cardigans, leggings are the way to go..don't believe me? ask the dishes.. they can sing they can dance...
:O)

minz, u need to edit this as best you can. my intellect only seems to kick in when on msn. somehow. actually, i'll go over it in the morning. this is 1st draft. set.

ALSO, of the two who stuck it out here after everyone else left for greener pastures (job-wise), one of us has been officially inducted into the laidback matey system (on so many levels), whilst the other just has to hop back in for a bit to reap the results of her year long endeavours too. and for the record, oz has WAY more weirdos and crazies traipsing around the place. cafes are NOT the place to pick up. ok. set.
whilst there are all the perks of city living, oz style, it is still very much outback in nature. no really. for example, one will still find the hugest ass spider lurking in the corner of a very enclosed area (a stiflingly stuffy room is nothing compared to having an eight-legged visitor from an open sliding door). having no outback jack at my immediate beck and call, i had to rely on my own resourcefulness (and quick thinking..or lackthereof) to lure the creep(y crawley) out of my humble abode. so i grabbed the only piece of machinery in the house that i was quite confident of a) working b)being able to reach the ceiling with. yes, i got it out...and generously gave it the shelter and warmth of the vacuum bag..a new home to make babies, no less. pimples aside, sitting in a room of growing dust mounds is manageable. even embarrassment is not enough to steer me in the direction of the storage cupboard to get the (possibly) spider-ridden vacuum out. it doesn't help that i saw the biggest ass spider (another one ok) climbing the window of the neighbour downstairs. needless to say, i did a paranoid routine check of all the sliding doors and latches. (you never know spiders these days...they may come equipped with latch-opening skills..eight legs to spare and all). what with a juice galavanting through the island east of the peninsular with camera crew in tow, and a chezel attending to domestic issues (dust,creepies,appliances), the melbourne connection looks all set to rock and roll into the next phase..over and out.

food for thought..

bon apetit

dinner at my place..really, what more need i say? :O) well, no one keeled over in the aftermath of food consumption (at least not whilst still in the vicinity), and that's always a good sign. thoroughly enjoyed myself, nonetheless. sunday's are like that. especially when one doesnt have the overwhelmingly dreadful shadow of "THE" monday looming closer every hour. but then, after 2 weeks of having every day feel like a glorious sunday, one begins to appreciate it less. it becomes awfully mundane and, worse still,makes one lose that sense of spontaneity that comes with having a timetable or schedule..a life, basically. yes, people,my current study of the self has just unearthed a dirty secret of societal conventions-having ample time to enjoy the little pleasures that make up the bigger picture equates to having an unfulfilled existence equates to being aimless (again,i'm choosing to not elaborate), therefore rendering the person void by society's standards. well, ok. not entirely void. but just by virtue of being indifferent to the rush and hustle-bustle of the current generation's mass lifestyle, one becomes an outsider (a harsh term, on all levels) and therefore needs to retreat further..more often than not, into the shell of conformity. really, we could learn a thing or two about living harmoniously-in-diversity from jelly bellys. human beans are the way to go. now, excuse me while i scamper off to the kitchen in search of a glucose-ridden food item. my sugar levels are relatively low for a tuesday at the mo.

self-discovery

again, i must thank stapey for fuelling my (purely academic) interest in the self. case study #1. :O)

You Are Sensual Sexy You exude a luxiourous sensuality in your everyday life Turning heads every where you go, it's all about your sexy attitude. You're naturally hot - gorgeous in both sweats and stilettos. Your biggest problem is that your utra sexy self sometimes scares men away. What Kind of Sexy Are You? Take This Quiz :-)

in festive mode...

i spent time with my beloved melbourne connection (rainbows and all) tonite. we feasted on the MOST AWESOME spread, cooked with love by our resident Chef Extroardinaire, alan (also part-time Artistic Director of Tony&Delon). MUCH APPRECIATED!!! it was really a nice way to usher in the new year...began with an early(!) walk to the city, compulsory after-quitting-visit to the cafe, holiday indulgences..ok, more of it... (jack johnson tix; ACO gig tix), lunch with brydz & tori, coffee at the cafe (again), window shopping, chit-chatted (in true CNY fashion) over dinner (and the tv) with the boys, random music conference with dede (other half of Tony&Delon),coffee (...what's one more cup..),and greeted the second day of new year with yet another rambling-babbling session with mals. celebration, indeed. :O)here's hoping everyone has an amazing start to the year, complete with prosperity and joy throughout (all four quarters, no less)!

everyone at home: you're in my thoughts always.lurveyalots. BIG HUGS!

keong hee fatt choy!kua chee..that's what we're missing. :O)

""WHEN I'M IN YOUR ARMS, NOTHING CAN BRING ME DOWN.."ben kweller.

whirlwind heat..name of a band i saw a year and a half ago. really catchy. the name's just on my mind. funny that, considering i'm having massive problems remembering what i did yesterday. just keeping track of my days is a whole activity in itself. the time and effort that goes into jotting down the miscellaneous bits and pieces that make up a day in my current unemployed state is (almost) commendable. having said that, i'm having trouble taking things one step at a time with everything else. i want it all now. i want to skip steps. hop hop hoppety hop skip LEAP. you'd think after all these years, i would've learnt how to eat one well-chewed mouthful at a time..even when carrying a full platter. well, it's not really a WANT. all comes down to impatience. which, of course, is wonderful at this very moment because it is only the most important part of the entire process...THE BEGINNING.oh here's another one: PROCRASTINATOR. no really. that soooooo wasn't obvious. JUST GIMME A JOB, dammit. i'm an earnest learner, hardworking, passionate about getting the job done (wa...at?...hello?), loyal. Come come. surely there's a need for some honest to goodness employees who are willing to be severely underpaid and doggedly overworked (complete with beaming smile, albeit slightly baggy, bloodshot eyes) out there? practically free labour. (ME ME ME) offer for limited time only.

but on this fluffy cloud i have chosen to perch myself on, there is always ample room for happy thoughts and moments (no matter how forgetful i am...plaguing mindlessness and all) of appreciation for the people around me, and their enduring patience (through my rambling impatience) and support (this really is one of those words that allows for me to be concise..as opposed to elaborating...yes, the general idea..). i sigh with content..for now.

HAPPPPPPPPPPYYYYYYYYYYYYYY NNNNNNEEEEEEWWWWWWW YYYYYYYEEEEEAAAAAARRRRRRRR!!!!!!!!!
21 days in..3 weeks...summmer heat,good company,fun fun fun. my memory isn't reallly doing anything for me at the moment..all the more reason to jot down all the miscellaneous details of the past 3 weeks of activity. entertaining and exciting on a whole new level, in relation to the most of last year's entertaining and exciting. yes, i am indeed living life out loud...possibly indulging in the most hedonistic of ways, but i've decided to let the hair down (yes, it's grown again and i'm considering yet ANOTHER haircut) and enjoy the big and small bits that form our very beings in this co-existence..my atom-ic self is bouncing around with all the other atoms in the widespread magic-coloured atmosphere. LITTLE RIPPLES OF EFFECT. bounce bounce bounce.. I LURVE YOU ALL...YOU lil BOMBS THAT MAKE MY LIFE THAT mUCH LOVELIER. BIG BIG BIG HUGS. oh indeed the new year is in. :O)

WORK-SHWORK

isn't it lovely, isn't it wonderful...having the familiarity of year-long activity, feeling comfortable and confident of one's ability, that feeling of being needed and wanted, taken,almost, for granted. although there is that constant need to reach out away, that thought, a feeling, everyday, it's that awakening, that shaking, that kick, that will propel reaction, a shaping up it will lick, also to dispel the sick, the tired, the overwhelmingly mundane feeling of repetition. it's time to enter the rat race, to be the competition. time may not linger,but catching up is really just at the tip of a finger...schedules aside, it's time to abide (by the rules of convention). oh yes, the days are long (and now longer still), but the end is nigh, so savour the last bits of it, really live that last high..working as a casual.

you don't have to break the cycle, just live it.

keep on walking. head held high. but don't forget to take in the surroundings. stimulate the senses. breathe in, exhale, feel it brush against your skin. Opportunities come around in the same way. it is the cyclical motion that nature procures as it's stylish approach to schedules...workings of world.

skip, hop, run,
go ahead take in fun,
enjoy the merry go-round,
the life you have found.
round and round it goes,
each ride revealing all
yet nothing,
brush up, feel inspired,
because you are already admired.
by those near and far,
those who truly know
who you are.

TOP 25 LIST

heh...amazing how the 25 songs most played on my iTunes are by the same 5 artists: Josh Rouse, Aqualung, Clare Bowditch, and Diana Krall. (Ruby's Grace, Lyrics Born, The Beatles, & Spymob all contribute one song each to the list though). and all the songs have the same sort of vibe. hmmmmm. goode vibrations indeed. SPRING.....!!

JAzziNg Up The Night

didnt want to at first, felt compelled to, made a decision and stuck to it (with a lil help, of course!). the work day was crazy because of the sales (seriously..WHAT sale..things aren't remarkably cheap..something along the lines of buying a full-priced pair entitles one to getting a second at half price...ok, great if u were eyeing two pairs from before..but it's not like it's FREE! c'mon ppl!) it felt like all the shoppers in the city had congregated at the one store. well, i guess it boded well for the cafe, business-wise. heh. imagine a store-ful of shoppers running on apollo-fuelled energy. oh, how gruelling an activity, exhausting even, it is to excercise one's purchasing power! one day, i may buy (heh) into it...but for the moment, i can only really window-shop. it's the one form of excercise that requires the least bit of money out of my (empty) pockets. ok, am so digressing. STOP. where was i...oh yesh. on my home from work, i decided to stop by my keeper's of sanity (oh what patient neighbours). the short of it, i found company to my workmate's 21st party@Shmik. we hung out there for a beer and super hyper conversation with another workmate & friend, then left in search of a place to while away more of the night. it was all very impromptu (as most goode nights are!). ended up not going to Croft Institute (there was a cover charge) or Misty's (not quite the vibe we were after), but found a nice booth at St Jerome's instead. :O) after a couple of wines, we moved on to the European (the lights came on and the kick-ass 70's & 80's music came to an end @ SJ...as all goode things do) and crappily hopped around (albeit slightly intoxicated, on my part) to the sounds of the cover band. [ohhhhhh staaaaappppppeeeeyyy... where have our pugg-ing days gone...]. as the end was nigh, i made a conscious (semi) decision to not leave remnants of my tummy's contents at the bar. so i opted for a llbitters to soothe the high and then we walked home (to the tune of hoppety-hoppety-skip-skip-WHOa! r u ok?!). :O) but really, the night was nice, not because of the alcoholic contents (ew ew ew ...so not doing wine again...ew.ew.ew), but due to the remarkably insightful and entertaining banter throughout. THANK YOU MY LOVELY FRIENDS!! i got through the door, again reinstated my decision to not hurl (totally didnt feel like cleaning up my already disgusting toilet), and made a quick dash for the couch to lay down the product of a night out for a homely ol' joe. thus,my once-a-quarter social expedition concluded for the term.

yes indeedy

ohmygoodness. can it be? truly? i've run out of ammo...i'm left with nothing to write. the week's events have proven to be interesting enough for a daily journal, p'haps,...but a blog? no sirree. i think not. what else can i then babble about>??? erm..hmmm....what about...mooosic? i'm currently listening to The Beatles' "White" album. and Diana Krall. and Josh Rouse. contented sigh. :O) and tomorrow (at work), i get to anticipate the pleasure of listening to Nelly Furtado, The Black-Eyed Peas (before they became aesthetically-inclined), Clare Bowditch, and...Jamie Callum. but then again, they may have changed the playlist over the weekend..hmmmm. yes indeedy.

ahem ahem. ecoutez si vous plait. merci beaucoup. Tous les jours sauf aujourd'hui!(today oh today of all days...)

was supposed to wake up extra early today to do some urgent grocery shopping (being the procrastinator i am, i've left it to the last square of tp to get some more...) and to make goode of my glorious weekend off. well, i got up early enough (for the time i actually crawled into bed) and cleaned up my room and created a nicer, more liveable messy space. wonderful. then hung out with my hyper active, 'e'-popping housemate who just moved back for the 2 week break from college (yaaay). then, went to meet a friend (moo's trish) for an appointment that had been set up 2 whole weeks in advance! after attacking a sumptious pear+choc tart and downing our coffees, we adjourned to fed square where a BIG ASS open-air dance party for peace had been organized by various melbourne city depts (eg. vic health....hmmmmm...oh did i mention that john so, lord mayor of melb, patronised the cafe on thursday? heh...we had to try real hard not to break out in our own renditions of "welkam tu ow byuhteefoo sihtay" whilst he was there...we're so mean). the festival, Earthdance began at 8am and went on for 12 hours straight. awesome stuff. when we got there, the music had progressed to techno-type stuff (so it was like a massive rave...but with only a few feral ravers...most of the audience was made of the hippy/grunge sort). although i'm not into that sort of music, the whole vibe from the area and the dancers around just really got me in the mood. and i spotted quite a few ppl from uni...familiar faces. *moo..we saw windsor...raving.. :O)* didnt stay till the end, went home instead to pig out on pizza wif reg & maliq. and somewhere between ordering pizza and picking up maliq next door, i LOST MY MOBILE!! and ohmygoodness, i am MAJORLY LOST without it!!!!!! UGH UGH UGH. i still havent found it. worst bit is that my fully charged phone has been switched off (it was on the last time i saw it). so i've either dropped it and it's broken into pieces, or i've dropped it and someone has picked up a creditless phone. dammit. hopefully it turns up at some point. (please please please) by losing my phone, i managed to sabotage an evening that was supposed to be akin to a set-up/date between two friends [me being the 'mutual friend' :O) ]. sigh.

there must be something i can do right...i'll find my niche someday, hopefully!!.
the impromptu night did turn out a lot better than expected though..we didnt manage to meet up with the other party (they must've left early or changed plans...ahem), BUT had an evening of awesome live music @ Rob Roy. yep, poor kid didnt get to make his moves today, and got stuck with me...all because of a misplaced phone! :O) Jen Cloher + The All About Mes were amazing. although i did miss watching deborah conway, ruby's grace, and bernie hayes trio, i think jen cloher absolutely made up for it!!! plus, i'll get to watch Ruby's Grace today at their special sunday arvo gig! ('twill be a nice close to this music appreciation weekend, methinx). after the gig, they spun music from the 70s,80s,early 90s, and brit punk rock(my fave!!). we decided to pub/club hop after that. managed to catch a bit of the Trojan Horns (a reggae/acid jazz outfit), then moved on to the Perseverance Bar for some commercial dancing moosic. a couple of shots later and many many many lemon-lime-bitters later(for me, at least), we were on our hyper way home..on foot. :O) heh. got home close to 4...and still have yet to make amends with my bed. soon soon.

missing all our pub outings and antics

love hugs kisses and goode vibes