total hours clocked in at work this weekend (fri-sun): 25.5hrs. woohoo! achybreakyfeet.

friday was unbelievably tiring...like physically. yes, i know. i'm a weakling. after 11.5 hours of standing, (with only a 30min break for the entire duration), i found i had wobbly legs (more than usual), an achy back, and a blurry eyes...[ well-toned leg muscles? loads of stamina?hello?] :O) from 4 o'clock, we began our 5 hour countdown. by 5pm, i was left with only one other person behind the counter, one on the floor, and a steady stream of customers for company. oh and truckload of jam, cream,milk,and tomato containers to fill, and LOADS of food to clear. am i complaining? no, just documenting. :O) it wasnt a mundane night anyhow. good stuff. dustan was really excited about his impending holiday ("only 2 sleeps!! yaay!"), and excitement is contagious. so, even for our state of fatigue (he was on for 12hrs), we were deliriously happy. delirium reigned. friday was also exciting for all @ apollo cos Ruby's Grace was having a gig at the cornish arms. on thursday we (well, all five of us that are dinosaurs,at least) were all set to go support 'em. on friday, our individual decisions fluctuated every couple of hours...at 8pm, i was all set to go home and veg out. at 9.30, i felt really really compelled to not let work get the better of me and of my word. so i hyped myself up enough to feel energized enough to wobble home, prettify myself (yeah rite..like it really makes a diffference), wait for a certain someone to stand me up, and merrily cab it out to the gig in time for the 2nd set. :O) i have to say...it was SO WORTH IT! they really are a goode live band. friendship aside, these guys know how to work a crowd. you feel their energy and love for the music. awesome stuff. seriousness.

Exciting Stuff.....
wednesday: 9am appointment with the dentist! then, retro shopping with my cousin.
thursday: work 10-6.30. dinner with workmates,p'haps.
friday: work 10-9.15. ruby's grace gig @ the cornish arms, 10pm.
saturday: work 11-6.15.
sunday: uncertainty looms (work?)
:O)

so work was ok today. wait...who am i kidding. hehe. it was one of those days where things didnt run as per normal...like we had our usual 10am rush, then we actually had a few quiet moments!! and then, of course, the boss comes in with his temporary 'solution' to the order and queuing mess that is the cafe system...and actually ends up making it a more arduous task to take orders and get dockets to the register, coffee machine, and toaster. oh and then he comes up to me and tells me how to basically "force" (My word, to be fair) the customer to have his/her sandwich toasted (ie.old sandwich). but that's the thing (i felt like telling him)...i dont REALLY want to sell 'em poor buggers ol' sandwiches for the price of a fresh one!! sighes. and it's like he seems to pick on me...previous incidents.. anyways, for some reason today i could feel that strain of annoyance tainting my usual vibe. probably the catalyst in my decision to go up to my manager and throw the, "sooooo...does michael (my boss) not like me or something?" question. in retrospect, that may not have been such a wise choice-of-action (well..duh...seeing as it was a rash one!). it was funny, my manager tried to apease me with the notion that EVERYBODY gets crap from the boss..and that he IS a DAMn critical dingbat....keyword here is EVERYBODY. did i mention everybody? well, that totally explains why he gets along pally wally with the other old staff and i get the "cheryl, where is this and that and why isnt this done and that done" rubbish..and i'm NOT even in a managerial/supervisor position!! I"M CASUAL STAFFF (dammit!). :O) i still have to smile...the politics of a cafe..ohmygoodness! imagine what it's like 'ouT there'!
oh, and did i mention that i was also, weirdly enough, suffering from an acute case of the giggles..ohmygoodness, it was SOOOOOOOOOoOOo bad..to the extent where i had to excuse myself in the middle of serving a customer because i was doubled up in laughter..at a very random moment. it all began with me asking a customer if she wanted a "bug" with her order. yes, i kid you not. this really beats the "wouuld you like that toasted" inquiry regarding a coffee. the simple explanation is that i was really asking her if she wanted a BAG for her order, but it came out VERY bahasa baku. see? i'm bilingual. :O) ahem. shy.

and then, my boss decides that he wants to pick my brains. oh ok. sort of. we have a sit down to discuss the efficiency issues...and by that time i'm feeling so blech that i actually lose all the fumble and over-excitement that plagues my person, and take my serious side for an airing. yep, even (in my opinion..heh) constructively criticized his "new" temp solution for the docketing system. i morphed into my planner, brainstormer alter ego...then i steppped back behind the counter and shrivelled up back into my semi-bimbo counter girl persona. ...HI THERE!! can i help you?? bounce bounce....

check it 1,2...aa aa yeh yeh.

after all that, i still feel damn crap. it's like an embarassment. no, that's not the word. it's like i feel like...a hypocrite. oh and a loser, maybe. i mean, isnt it just a tad bit sad that i had NO ONE to drag along with me tonight? isnt it?? and i feel like the kid's not going to believe me anymore. oh no!! this is really buggin me.
it's 2am. and i still havent done my homework for work. i;ve got to list down the problems that we are experiencing as counter staff, in relation to customers and service. now, how do i tell the boss that the root of the problem lies in the SYSTEM itself? and this can only really be rectified by changing the layout of the cafe counter itself. there is no space, the system within which we operate does not allow for quick and efficient service during rushes and BUSY BUSY BUSY lunch, the registers are slow, insufficient manpower. how? and how does one suggest solutions when one can't really think? and how am i expecting to enter the workforce proper and do "brainstorming" and be a planner when i cant even find be resourceful in a small project like this? 2.15 am..and still thinking.....6hours to go.

i suck i really do.
and let me tell you, it's annoying knowing that you've just (possibly) let someone down...regardless of the fact that your actions may, in reality, have not had the slightest impact whatsoever on the afore said person. nevertheless, if it's the thought that counts (in most cases), then yes, indeed, i do suck. [btw, the "suck" I'M referring is NOT in least bit connected to any sort of physical action...such dirty buggers]. :O) yes, i did say i would "try" to go for the gig. but isnt it common knowledge that these sort of random statements do have a lil asterisk on the top..for "subject to change" at the bottom of the agreements page (in a conversation). isnt it????? no???
i feel bad. BUT (come come, let me redeem myself)!...I AM DEFINITELY going to support the band on FRIDAY for the bigass gig!! (erm, so there). this i PROMISE. regardless of the fact that i'll be on my feet for all 11 hours before the peformance... :O) no, i'm not whinge-ing. really. and YES, i really do like the mooosic!! they're an awesome live band. the album's great for easy listening. hmmmm...an investment, p'haps...
wait wait. let's get back to the point. so i didnt go tonite for the solo gig. and tmr i shall have to face the music..(heh)...this is the 2nd time i've done a no-show. dammit. but today, i didnt really feel like braving the cold and big bad world that is sydney road (yes, the area where bismi, the cornish arms, savers (and probably a few bits and pieces of that gunned down gangland leader) reside). ok. so that's 3 goode things and one DAMN dodgy. still... and let's not forget that i'd have had to board a tram on elizabeth st...now we all remember that "will you give me your urine pls" crazy loooney i bumped into last year...ahem [*shudddeerrrrrr]. put 'em together and hey! you've got plenty of reason to cosy up on the couch and watch the fab 5 sprinkle their special brand of fairy dust on the latest to join the 'gay or attached' list. :O)

WOOHOO! :O) so much to say, so lil time (sleep abeckons), so many limitations (frozen fingers,toes..the list seems endless). stuckey..i took a photo in your honour some time ago whe i was traipsing around sydney rd..now i've just got to figure out how to web-ivate it.

every time i sit myself down to write...i always have the same problem: i dont quite know where to start and what topic to harp on. (me? opinionated? hmmmm) so, i've decided to make a list of things that i would like to talk about or that have crossed my mind today, in an effort to boost my rather fledgling ability to document..or focus, for that matter. right. here we go.
TUESDAY: *struggled to dislodge myself from the warm comfort of my bed..cold morning **am planing to invest in a bicycle by the end of the week..secondhand or not! *got asked by a customer if i was sick *chatted with my manager about travelling & asia (do i get brownie points?) *cleaned the damn dusty fridge-tops at work..the dust was soooo thick, it looked like several rats had decided to shed their hair on top of the fridge..ew *OH THIS ONE IS AWESOME: when i got to work this morning, my manager announced that it was staff discount day at myer today...20% off! altho i dont have a staff card, apparently i only needed to flash my badge. here's the best part..couldn't think of ANYTHING that i really wanted to buy. HOW SAD IS THAT!! on this, the day i actually get to excercise my right as a sub-myer employee! ah well. such is. :O) *am thinking of goin to watch The Who!! :O) rock on.

GOOD MORNING SUNSHINE!! yep..i'm back in blooody cold melbourne..just the way i like it! sydney was incredibly relaxing. exactly what i needed..i got to spend quality time getting reacquainted with some of my all-time favourite pastimes, such as reading and playing the piano~!! who knew that after all these years, i would WANT to list these things amongst my hobbies. really shows how much those schooling years really affect one's life. wait wait...knitting has already made a comeback. now just awaiting the painting muse. maybe, just maybe, cross stitch, although that may be stretching it a little. anyways, back to the trip. i have to say that the 12 hour bus ride was actually pretty interesting and somewhat (dare i say it) NICE. ok, so maybe the novelty of travelling with a whole bus-full of backpackers did make it that bit more exciting. [and no, it wasnt filled to the brim with german travellers...just two. so there :Op] the bus left the terminal a bit after 8pm,and i promptly made friends with the girl beside me. she was from the uk, but of chinese descent. funnnily enough, the girl sitting in front of me was scottish, but also of chinese (or something similar) descent. pretty klew. gemma was pretty fun...and in that 12 hours, our conversation snowballed from work to travels to MUSIC!yep, i met a bluegrass fan with an appreciation for music in general (regardless of genre). so,we exchanged notes on artistes and cds (yes, i brought mine along!!) for quite a few hours. kekekeke. there were two stops throughout the journey...one every 4 hours. the first was in albury/wodonga, whilst the second was in gouldburn. ended up having a hot choc at 4 am. [wat sleep?] reached sydney, had b'fast with gemma, parted ways, got picked up by my uncle in the city (town hall), went to a cafe & book shop near the college of fine arts (UNSW)...a fave hangout of my uncle's, and then headed to his place (abt 45 mins away from the city...northwest of sydney). had a shower, a bit of a snooze, lunch, then headed out to the city for a bit of a memory refresher and then on to UNSW to pick up my cousin (who's reading law). ahem. oh, here's the interesting part. whilst waiting for my cousin to finish class, my uncle (who purchased an art history book along the way) & i sat ourselves down on a bit of lawn in UNSW grounds, and he read aloud to me, stopping every now and again so we could have little discussions about the readings.ahem. must've looked pretty karate kid-ish (yes, my uncle does somewhat resemble mr miyagi]. throughout the course of the weekend, i got to learn and see some of my uncle's paintings and views on art. also got to look at some of his sketches (amazing!). ALSO, my cousin managed to coax some of my hibernating interest in movie-watching back into action (watched extended versions of LOTR1 & 2, Pirates of the Carribean, and a bit of The Quiet American). AND we had quiet moments where i read (YES SOME STIMULATION!!!), instead of making an aimless trek out to a densely populated shopping area. it's all these small li'l activities that actually made the weekend fascinating for me. i can't really describe (especially with this horrible diminishing vocabulary and writing structure syndrome [DVWSS] i seem to be suffering from) how much i actually enjoyed myself, but in a passive way, as opposed to it being a feeling i was conscious of during the weekend. i predict i'm going to be reading this in a few days time with one eyebrow raised, and possibly a scrunched up face expressing nothing more than "WADDA". hey, it's 2am. 'nuff said. :O)

righty ho then. HELLO all. i'm sitting here in my cutesy room at 11A..home of my ee,uncle eng, and my cousin, shan-ree. i could practically start up my home business here..everything i would need is in this room: fax, phone & answering machine, imac,printer,bed,cupboard,shelves,floor to ceiling windows, and PAINTINGS! very nice. i likes. funny how i've journeyed all the way to sydney to immerse myself in the laidback lifestyle of suburbia. nice. very very nice. love that i can cuddle up in the living area with a book and sip nice homemade coffee, or take a walk out to the backgarden where a self-maintained herb and vege patch await inspection and appreciation. where a mango tree bears great fruit and flowers grow in abundance. *sigh of content*

"when i fall in love, i take my time, there's no need to hurry when i'm making up my mind. u can turn off the sun, but i'm still going to shine..."

oh and stapey...likewise...my blog's only read by only a select few. the 'klew' ppl. we is the bomb. "THE MAGIC THAT IS U AND ME". i think i need to find a proper job. but i am suddenly going thru this phase of "oh no..what do i want to do?" how come. WHY WHY WHY. i think i'm just starting to freak out due to a very clueless and very unrefined cv. yes, a piece of paper is giving me the shivers. FIRE! (remember, HELP doesnt reallly grab anyone's attention anymore...buggerly ppl that cry wolf). altho, i think jason mraz has got it all figured out..he's definitely remedying me for the moment.."...when it all amounts to nothing in the end. i wont worry my life away.. Iiiiiiiiiiii WONT WORRREEE MY LIFE AWAY..heeeyyy wooooh". WOOHOOO! :O)

WELLL HELLO THERE MOOMOO!!ahem...MEZ!!!man, still not over a certain techy huh. :O) u know what this is..this is a form of escapism. lazy route, albeit. what and why u ask..well, take me for example. i blog cos i i dont particularly feel like picking up a pen and writing in my diary.....my last entry was AGES AGO..we're talking 12 months or so. but then again, i didnt write then also because i didnt feel up to documenting that particular period. AND THEN, i became weaker and lazier, physically. so typing it is. and i think blogging allows for that sense of living life dangerously...the writings are meant to be somewhat private, yet are written with the notion(subconsciously?) or understanding that they are easily accessible to the 'public'. it's almost like putting on a show. perhaps.
ok. so what does this have to do wif my beloved moomoo bloggin on? absolutely nothing. or maybe just a tad. it's 2.47 am and i have to wake up in 5 hours for work..just about the right time for some good ol' nonsense. woohoo!

HELLO THERE STUCKY WUCKERS...ekkekekee. :O) yesh, i have been a checking ur booger. i mean blogger. i mean blog. watever. nevertheless, i have been rendered internetless on the homefront for some time, so the times that i actually checked have been few and far between. just like the frequency of my brain activity. how do i keep myself busy? i rave and rant occassionally. and then some. hehe. ignore that previous post. should delete it but i want to be able to read back and have a bloody goode laugh at myself. hey, at least i find myself entertaining, buster. NEWSFLASH: my primary school bestest fren came over to melb for a 4 day visit, after spending 5 days in perth (graduating and all). she just left today. it was her first time being away from the south-east asian region. so kewl. twas fun...we sang away the nights (croaky voices and all), ate away the evenings (was working till 6 most days) and laughed away the mornings (me rushing to work,she talkin in her sleep). was damn proud of her cos she walked all over the place by herself etc. a college fren of hers also took her on the "great ocean road drive"..so she saw pretty much all the touristy melb stuff in 4 days. OH AND HERE"S THE INTERESTING BIT: she is cousin's wif jean yong (who studies architecture at melb uni..the one who's 'trashy' party i gatecrashed) and she knows fooch & family from back home. WAHLAU. connections.

here's one i heard at a trivia nite... Q:what's the difference between a tub of yogurt and australia?
A: after a period of time,the yogurt develops culture...
OUCH!
this is the second trivia nite i've attended with my apollo counterparts..today our team (aptly titled 'myer') was made of alison & her fren (laura),sanju,lauren & her fren (amy),me. two weeks ago, it was alison,me,nicola,& collum. the first trivia session,our team tied for first place in round two, but lost out in the tie-breaker. oh wells...as the mc at young & jacksons says(in more words), LOSERS ROCK!!heh.
hung out quite a few times with ppl from work..they're pretty nice. i still think, however, they don't quite know what to make of me...like they havent quite figured me out yet. probly cos i'm such a dumbass at work..can't seem to function in everyday life. GENIUS?? we'll have to wait and see :O). SOMEONE PAT ME ON THE BACK AND TELL IT"S OK..or at least see thru the stupidity...is that toooooo much to ask?????????? no really, i'm really nice :Op
let's see...i've gone out to Vegie Bar (brunswick st) for dinner (brydie,ben,lauren,alex,yvonne,geraldine,nicolette),Planet Cafe (brunswick st) for dinner/drinks [alex,yvonne,ali,ish,nicola,lisa,kevin). also went for dinner,coffee(brunetti's),movie(21grammes)[brydie,ali,sanju,carmen] a week ago.
am i replacing my beloved uni gang? no...tis different. but it's kinda kewl..cos i feel a bit more confident with myself...kinda getting a direction, a bit more feeling for what i want to do...ok, let's face it. INDEPENDENCE. i still need to figure out my passion, my focus lens needs to be cleaned. but i think i'm kinda getting back that groove,vibe,excitement for things to be. i think. at the same time i am sorely missing those ppl who made up parts of my three years away from home. the ppl who shared all those precious moments (goode,bad,ugly,hilariously outrageous) in melbourne, and those who added to the experience from afar. it's like one bit of me lapses into a sort of desolate state,yet there's some stress from other channels that revive/reboot the system in order to get things done. so, i think, that absolute state of loneliness will not (has not?) set in as long as i keep myself occupied..with things relevant.
self revelation.
Q: what do u do?
A: i currently SEEK MYSELF.

IN LIVING COLOUR...i took one of those colour tests and the result is in...
<

BLUE You give your love and friendship unconditionaly. You enjoy long, thoughtful conversations rich in philosophy and spirituality. You are very loyal and intuitive. Find out your color at Quiz Me!

:O) i dont think i actually have an all-time favourite colour..really depends on what suits my fancy at that particular moment. i do think, though, that blue is a happy colour. but then again, everything is a happy colour really. it just depends on how it is contextualised...how it is used, what it is used for, what it might represent for the subject/individual. colour is wonderful..it has the power to manipulate and even stipulate the think tank, yet it encourages interaction...it's a symbiosis of sorts. we feed off each other. classic human activity. colour has become synonymous with progress...artificial and unrealistic yet symbolic of technological development and capability. are we a society of nit-wit dreamers who's (collective) idea of utopia is being realised (& re-imagined) into a land of the inanimate? perhaps. do we like it? perhaps. do we want to change it? hmmmm...maybe before we reach a pollution-inducing stage...perhaps.

UGH!..no one mention traffic lights to me for a while ok.....

what have i been up to? well, in the past month...watched longwave,waikiki,ben lee in action @ prince of wales(sept 9); had a visit from dad & had him take me and my pals out for dinner,cake & coffee(sept 21); had a birthday surprise visit from the same pals the following day(sept 22); had dinner with PREMALA & the gang to mark her 21st...HAPPPPY BIRTHDAYY PARA!!!!!!; went scuba diving with mary, regine & frens, & MSA [aiyeer! :O)] at Mornington Peninsula (stayed at Bayplay Lodge in Rye,and jumped off the pier at Portsea);gone for several jazz jam sessions @ dizzy's with bloss; went for the Livid Festival 2003(oct 12) with jem,pearly & terence. and i'm sure i watched treetops at some point as well. hmmmmm.

"Friends don't occur by the bunch.
It only takes one to be rich with abundance"
(Susan Faith)

a bigass nod and AYE. but when u are lucky enough to have a group of them...it's kinda like catching a falling star...you keep it safe in your shirt pocket...altho saving it for a rainy day is really a matter of opinion. for me, putting it in the pocket is a question of logistics...the star then is closer to the heart..literally. that's where i keep mine, at least.my group of 'em. the clothing apparel i don may change now and again but that particular spot is reserved, pocket or no pocket. love,peace,hugs,kisses.