innnnnnn commmmmiiiinnnnnngggg!

yes, it is! new start, new year! fun times ahead, as always.

a short but necessary reminder to the self on the importance of releasing thoughts through words blogged in a contained environment..hopefully, this will jog the memory and my retention of vocabulary will surpass expectations..and then some! :)

for ramble's worth, anything that has occurred at least 6 months ago (or thereabouts) is worth toasting to for "old times sake", reliving through memories penned in a connected-disconnected fashion.

ah, rambles, how i've missed you.

hugs.

of fresh starts.

dammit.  upgraded my blog and lost my past events sidebar! ooowhhh! it was my little link to days gone by (the life and times circa 2005/2006) and now i don't have anything to refer to (to reminisce and well, to compare my state of affairs currently with the past - read: how motivated and on-the-go i am/ was).
dammit.
might as well make this a toast to new beginnings, then! fresh start, new events to blog about.
yeah!

blog back from the dead.

or maybe not..but at least it's a start! :O)


oh my, the days are passing by so quickly and i seem to be having trouble keeping up. perhaps it is time to hit the track and whip myself (amongst other things) back into shape.


but here's a toast to the end of 2009 (yes, it has been that long since i have commented on and tracked my everyday activities) and fingers crossed this need to move the fingers continues into the new year.


amen.

of mustard-tinged resolutions

To start the year with my usual musings would be far too normal and wouldn't resonate the sense of excitement and eagerness I seem to have awoken this year thus far. But first, in true klutzworks-style (if ever there was such a thing), let me recap the final moments of 2006 as I lived it:
November with the usual rigmarole of work and play - celebrated nal's birthday, aisling and mohan got hitched, made a few new friends, discovered more of melbourne with the parentals,
December: relished in my last few days for the year in Melbourne before returning to the homeland to play tour guide extroardinaire, spent the last 14 days of 2006 eating, shopping, discovering new and old sightseeing spots, catching up and running into friends and comrades from school days.
Highlights: Puff's houseparty, Nal's xmas party, Attic (random night with high school, college,and uni friends), NYE @ Attic, The Band @ Ol' Skool...
and most importantly, remembering all the days gone by - the bad and the good, thick and thin, and reliving the moments with the people who count the most. BIG HUGS!

Things to remember for the new year (and for when I begin the arduous task of re-reading past posts for the sake of re-reading past posts): the mind is a fertile ground - letting it go barren is as rubbish as making a flowerpot house pebbles; salt makes everything more palatable, sugar masks the pinch; finishing is just the icing, starting takes the cake. Yes, these are my goals for the year (what? what code?!!).
oh, and yellow is in..for the long-haul. the blues can get pretty stale.

LOVE HUGS AND CHOCOLATE COOKIE CHUNK PEACE.
:O)

somewhere along the way...

i've lost all rational thought. i have no sense of direction. my head feels like an empty vessel just waiting to pounce on anything even remotely educational to fill that void. and yet it doesn't seem to care if it answers questions or not. are there even questions, i cant be sure. in the same breadth, i have a gazillion things on my 'to-do (theoretically) list' which i have not even attempted but am hungering leap into RIGHT NOW. unfortunately, many of the (fun) and most suitable things (for me at this point in my life - age, thirst for adventure, social standing) are not quite within my grasp due to the monetary aspect. i know things can happen, if you want it badly enough. but do i really? do i want to spend 'x' amount of money (of which i will have to work my butt off to attain- byebye 48 hour weekends!) on i) a brand new setting/life or ii) on further studies. both may have a drastic (not negatively) impact on my life and career goals. but then again, one may have me on more of a solid footing even during the process. AND SINCE WHEN did my blog become a site for my philosophical agonising and whingeing...

i digress. but like always. SO MANY PATHS TO TAKE. BUT WHICH ONE TO CHOOSE?

like eating copenhagen ice cream in manly...

You Are Chocolate Ice Cream

You have a flair for the dramatic and love to party. Your personality is super strong and unique. Many people crave you constantly - while you turn a few off. You are most compatible with coffee ice cream.

What Flavor Ice Cream Are You?

things to make the stuffy nose & head go away...

Your Five Factor Personality Profile

Extroversion: You have medium extroversion. You're not the life of the party, but you do show up for the party. Sometimes you are full of energy and open to new social experiences. But you also need to hibernate and enjoy your "down time." Conscientiousness: You have medium conscientiousness. You're generally good at balancing work and play. When you need to buckle down, you can usually get tasks done. But you've been known to goof off when you know you can get away with it. Agreeableness: You have medium agreeableness. You're generally a friendly and trusting person. But you also have a healthy dose of cynicism. You get along well with others, as long as they play fair. Neuroticism: You have medium neuroticism. You're generally cool and collected, but sometimes you do panic. Little worries or problems can consume you, draining your energy. Your life is pretty smooth, but there's a few emotional bumps you'd like to get rid of. Openness to experience: Your openness to new experiences is high. In life, you tend to be an early adopter of all new things and ideas. You'll try almost anything interesting, and you're constantly pushing your own limits. A great connoisseir of art and beauty, you can find the positive side of almost anything.

The Five Factor Personality Test

setting adrift my memory bliss..

it's mildly saddening (and i swear that was not an exagerration..cue roll eyes) when people you've come to cherish and uphold in the highest regard become an utter waste of time and space in your ship of friends. It's like this one sailor has decided to defect just to be different (read: to be center of attention) and decides to rope in an unwitting member to fall prey in becoming, ultimately, the villain of the sea (without proper cause and effect). childish. farqin childish. farg.

I am what i am and what i am is what i am...so go get your own boat if it's giving you the shits. And whilst you're about it, take those other two-faced wheezebag-asswipes with you. There. Enough to start up your own bandwagon complete with the shit-stirrers and wipe-ups. All ready to go. SO GO ALREADY. farq.

Well then, the sails are off, the boat is adrift and this is one pirate who has played the role to the end. stump leg and all. acting like an ughly motherchorte, but who gives a damn really.

The sinking feeling is worse than actually being at the bottom. The reality of knowing that I was so easily set adrift and then blamed for keeping afloat sux. But nothing hurts more than the knowledge that you were sailing solo all along. I want to be elsewhere, warm and snug, loved and hugged. I want out now. the clock ticks. I have fallen into destiny's folds.

Either letting go is easy, or I've one too many rash decisions tonight that have in turn made a fool out of me.

Hitting back the hurt ball seems so much easier to do, so here's one for my side.

farq.
you.